I’ve finally adjusted to my commute, which is over an hour long. Remember, I used to live so close to my job on Block Island that I could walk there (though I never did, which might explain why I was fat). Since others might also be experiencing the joys of a long commute, here’s a list of fun games I’ve made up to play on your ride to and from work:
1. What’s That Noise?
This fun time-killer will have you going crazy in no time. Possible thoughts will include Do I have a flat tire? or Am I behind a gravel truck? and Is there a rabid weasel attached to the undercarriage of my car?
Not to be confused with . . .
2. What’s That Smell?
An entertaining variant of What’s That Noise?, this game will have you wondering Is my engine on fire? or Did I pack rotten eggs in my lunch this morning?
3. Hello, Fellow Commuters
You’ll soon realize that you’re seeing some of the same people every day during your drive. I’ve learned, for instance, that the blue van that speeds down Route 2 every morning with the sign reading Carrying School Children should not be. Then there’s the car with the license plate IKESMA who likes to travel at 50 m.p.h. in the left lane. I hate her, not just for her annoying traveling habits, but because she named her kid after a cartoon character on South Park.
4. Test your Bluetooth Commands
If you’re driving, you should have a Bluetooth. Take this time to learn what that gadget can do! My Bluetooth, for instance, recognizes “Find the nearest gas station” as the command for “call 9-1-1.” Fun times!
5. Stalk the Traffic Reporter Guy
In Connecticut, there seems to be just one guy in the whole state who reports on traffic for every station across the radio dial. His name is Mark. I like to follow him across the radio. He starts off on 96.5 TIC as "Mark the Shark," then hops over to 100.5 WRCH as "Mark Christopher." Sometimes I catch him on WTIC 1080 AM, and then I lose him. But I'll find him, sooner or later. I've got time.
6. Match up your CDs to your Commute
It's fun to try and figure out which of your CDs will line up perfectly with your commute. After stalking Mark for a while, I take the information he's given me (accident on 84 East, say, or Mark lives in Glastonbury) and choose the appropriate CD. Light traffic means I can get in the entire Violent Femmes' Viva Wisconsin! album; a jackknifed tractor trailer means it's time for the Beatles' 1 album. Duran Duran's Greatest CD works best when traffic is moving along but slowing up by the Glastonbury exit.
7. Play 'Dodge-the-Pothole'
Most of my time is split up between What's That Noise? and this game. You will quickly learn which lanes along which routes have the worst potholes, and drive accordingly. I'm sure to the drivers behind me it looks like I'm trying to dodge velociraptors in the kitchen, but trust me, those swerves are necessary. The biggest challenge happens around Hartford, when I have to avoid the potholes without getting stuck behind Ike's mother. I award myself points for every blown out tire I see along the side of the road (one point each, but if you spot a whole tire, including rim, like I did today, that's worth at least ten). When you reach 100 points (and you will, quickly) your reward is a greater appreciation for your vehicle and its tires.
There you have it. These fun on-the-road games will help your commute pass by in no time!
1. What’s That Noise?
This fun time-killer will have you going crazy in no time. Possible thoughts will include Do I have a flat tire? or Am I behind a gravel truck? and Is there a rabid weasel attached to the undercarriage of my car?
Not to be confused with . . .
2. What’s That Smell?
An entertaining variant of What’s That Noise?, this game will have you wondering Is my engine on fire? or Did I pack rotten eggs in my lunch this morning?
3. Hello, Fellow Commuters
You’ll soon realize that you’re seeing some of the same people every day during your drive. I’ve learned, for instance, that the blue van that speeds down Route 2 every morning with the sign reading Carrying School Children should not be. Then there’s the car with the license plate IKESMA who likes to travel at 50 m.p.h. in the left lane. I hate her, not just for her annoying traveling habits, but because she named her kid after a cartoon character on South Park.
4. Test your Bluetooth Commands
If you’re driving, you should have a Bluetooth. Take this time to learn what that gadget can do! My Bluetooth, for instance, recognizes “Find the nearest gas station” as the command for “call 9-1-1.” Fun times!
5. Stalk the Traffic Reporter Guy
In Connecticut, there seems to be just one guy in the whole state who reports on traffic for every station across the radio dial. His name is Mark. I like to follow him across the radio. He starts off on 96.5 TIC as "Mark the Shark," then hops over to 100.5 WRCH as "Mark Christopher." Sometimes I catch him on WTIC 1080 AM, and then I lose him. But I'll find him, sooner or later. I've got time.
6. Match up your CDs to your Commute
It's fun to try and figure out which of your CDs will line up perfectly with your commute. After stalking Mark for a while, I take the information he's given me (accident on 84 East, say, or Mark lives in Glastonbury) and choose the appropriate CD. Light traffic means I can get in the entire Violent Femmes' Viva Wisconsin! album; a jackknifed tractor trailer means it's time for the Beatles' 1 album. Duran Duran's Greatest CD works best when traffic is moving along but slowing up by the Glastonbury exit.
7. Play 'Dodge-the-Pothole'
Most of my time is split up between What's That Noise? and this game. You will quickly learn which lanes along which routes have the worst potholes, and drive accordingly. I'm sure to the drivers behind me it looks like I'm trying to dodge velociraptors in the kitchen, but trust me, those swerves are necessary. The biggest challenge happens around Hartford, when I have to avoid the potholes without getting stuck behind Ike's mother. I award myself points for every blown out tire I see along the side of the road (one point each, but if you spot a whole tire, including rim, like I did today, that's worth at least ten). When you reach 100 points (and you will, quickly) your reward is a greater appreciation for your vehicle and its tires.
There you have it. These fun on-the-road games will help your commute pass by in no time!
Three points.
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